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JaneB

Coronavirus COVID-19

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Apologies to Jane in advance:

 

A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,
very, closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"

  • Haha 1

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chara   

Droy!....

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chara   

OK...we all are trying to smile in a very difficult time...Best of British even if that is considered unsophisticated these days.

As a suggestion... all the regulars on here..plus anyone who wants to of course....is it possible for all of you to give a brief update of how things are in your personal space?

We all squabble and trade "opinions" but we are all Chelsea and I do worry about posters who don't appear for a while..during normal times it is in the ebb and flow of the forum..but now it would be of comfort to know how all are doing and a way of supporting each other.

Thoughts?

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Stim   

Under complete lockdown. Can only leave the house to go buy food. Can't even go for a jog.

Then to pile the misery on our financial rating got downgraded so I guess those dickheads are working from home and decide to pile that on during a global pandemic. Seems like a bunch of nice guys.

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Sciatika   

My partner is in one of the risk groups and so I have been given the chance to be able to look after her. However, it also means that only I go out at all and that is rare, maybe twice a week. I do some shopping in the local shops. I cover myself from head to foot in scarves, gloves, hat & coat and so on. I must look like a right sight. I worry about getting the things we need but so far its been fine. The local shops are a bit more expensive than the big supermarkets but I don't have to queue for hours. I was a software developer for thirty-five years and run my own companies. I am retired now. My main hobbies are making music, history and watching the finest team in the land. At home, I keep myself busy revising for summer exams that are unlikely to happen. I am in my third year of a four-year history degree. I am considering deferring the final year. I am not that bothered about graduation at my age and the idea of doing lectures on remote is not that appealing and certainly not worth the fees. Besides, I already have a First in Music. My partner is an artist but opportunities are limited at the moment. She spends most days in our little garden tending to the plants and in the evening she is learning Scots Gaelic. We are quiet and self-contained but very dependent on each other.

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chara   

....but very dependant on each other...I second that..... my sister is a retired language teacher..(like Chippendale was a woodworker!) and has studied a bit of Gaelic....

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chara   

Ok..Social Distancing...I suspect Mrs C is over reacting...I asked if I could come indoors for a few minutes to warm up...she set MY OWN DOGS on me..I managed to get up a tree fortunately taking this lap top with me......

Small mercies..the senior dog didn't join in..just skulked into the kitchen cravenly choosing the food source....

 

75812995-4A67-4A97-8806-2977D5B3B375tree dogs.jpeg

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Ham   
34 minutes ago, chara said:

Ok..Social Distancing...I suspect Mrs C is over reacting...I asked if I could come indoors for a few minutes to warm up...she set MY OWN DOGS on me..I managed to get up a tree fortunately taking this lap top with me......

Small mercies..the senior dog didn't join in..just skulked into the kitchen cravenly choosing the food source....

 

75812995-4A67-4A97-8806-2977D5B3B375tree dogs.jpeg

😆

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Lockdown in Spain was extended last week to April 12th.. Now our President is floating the idea of May before we are released.

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18 hours ago, chara said:

OK...we all are trying to smile in a very difficult time...Best of British even if that is considered unsophisticated these days.

As a suggestion... all the regulars on here..plus anyone who wants to of course....is it possible for all of you to give a brief update of how things are in your personal space?

We all squabble and trade "opinions" but we are all Chelsea and I do worry about posters who don't appear for a while..during normal times it is in the ebb and flow of the forum..but now it would be of comfort to know how all are doing and a way of supporting each other.

Thoughts?

I'm in Acton in west London, working from home. Getting up early most days to get a 10k run in before there's even modest traffic. Toying with the idea of going for a bigger run later in the week; feels far too long since I saw Stamford Bridge so may run past it!*

Haven't got the same beautiful scenery here to photograph and share with anyone, but do have a cat that seems to have very quickly gone off the idea of having it's owners home with it 23 hours a day!

*Edit: just checked, a 13.5km round route. That's my Friday morning sorted!

Edited by thevelourfog

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